THE   GOLDEN        
               M              
                                          
             LETS HEAR IT FOR             
             MC DONALDS             
                                          
 WHAT     CAN     I     DO     YA     FOR 
                                          
              CHEESEBURGER              
                 NUGGETS                
           DOUBLE CHEESEBURGER          
                  FRIES                 
            CARBONATED WATER            
           BEARNAISE DIP SAUCE          
                 BIG MAC                
                 COFFEE                 
                                          
                               
                                          
 IT  ALL  BEGAN  A THOUSAND YEARS AGO  IN 
 LIKE  THE  EIGHTEENTH  CENTURY.  A  DARK 
 FIGURE  EMERGED  FROM A  TAVERN  AFTER A 
 FEW YEARS  APPRENTICESHIP, WITH AN IDEA. 
 IT  WAS  ILLEGAL  TO  SELL  FOOD  IN THE 
 REGION FOR EVERYBODY EXCEPT THAT TAVERN. 
                                          
        BUT MARIGOLD DIDN'T CARE.         
                                          
 SHE  BEGAN  PUTTING  DRIED  LIZARD  MEAT 
 BETWEEN TWO  BREAD SLICES, OPERATING OUT 
 OF  A  CART,  NOT  STAYING  IN THE  SAME 
 PLACE LONG.  IN  THE DAY  SHE  SLEPT, IN 
 THE EVE  SHE SOLD  HER WARES, AND IN THE 
            NIGHT SHE POACHED.            
                                          
 AFTER A FEW YEARS,  MARIGOLDS  FOOD CART 
 HAD   A  REPUTATION.   SHE   CALLED   IT 
             THE GOLDEN M             
 AND PEOPLE  TALKED  ABOUT THE  GOLDEN M. 
 THE OLD TAVERN HAD  THEIR  MONOPOLY  AND 
      DIDN'T CHANGE THEIR MENU MUCH.      
   MARIGOLDS SECRET LIZARD FOODCART WAS   
              NEW AND FRESH.              
                                          
 HOWEVER,  SHE BECAME A LITTLE  TOO  WELL 
 KNOWN.  THE  TAVERNS  MEN  HOT   ON  HER 
 TRAIL, SHE  COULD  STAY  A  SHORTER  AND 
 SHORTER TIME IN  EACH LOCATION. SHE FELT 
 HUNTED.  AND SOON  ENOUGH THERE  CAME  A 
 TIME  WHEN THEY STARTED WATCHING FOR HER 
 AT   THE   GATES   OF   EVERY   VILLAGE. 
                                          
 SO SHE HID  THE  CART, AND  DISAPPEARED, 
                 FOREVER.                 
                                          
                                   
                                          
 AFTER   THIRTY   YEARS,   A   MAN  NAMED 
 NICHOLAS  FOUND  THE   CART.  HE  WAS  A 
    CURSED ENTREPRENEUR (THEY ALL ARE     
 (CURSED, I  MEAN))  AND  AS  SUCH  HE OF 
 COURSE THOUGHT IT  A GOOD IDEA TO FOLLOW 
         IN MARIGOLDS FOODSTEPS.          
                                          
 HE  WASN'T  ALL THAT OF A COOK, AND EVEN 
 THOUGH SOME RECOGNIZED THE GOLDEN M,  HE 
 QUICKLY FELL  INTO  INFAMITY. HOWEVER HE 
 WAS  KIND OF  A  HARDHAT AND DIDN'T STOP 
 TRYING. THE  TAVERN DIDN'T CARE  FOR HIM 
 SINCE  NOBODY  BOUGHT  HIS  FOOD  ANYWAY 
 (AND   ALSO   THEY   HAD  EXPANDED   TOO 
  QUICKLY, SUCCUMBED TO CORRUPTION, AND   
 WAS IN THE  PROCESS OF  FALLING  APART). 
                                          
 ANGRY AT EVERYONE FOR  NOT UNDERSTANDING 
 HIS    FOOD,    HE   VOWED    TO   LEAVE 
          KIRUGU VARGIR ENTIERLY.         
                                          
              WHICH HE DID.               
                                          
                                     
                                          
 WE DONT  KNOW MUCH ABOUT HOW HE TRAVELED 
 OR WHERE, BUT EVENTUALLY HE ENDED  UP ON 
          EARTH IN THE FIFTIES.           
 UPON FINDING  OUT  THAT  EARTH  HOLDS NO 
 EDIBLE LIZARDS, HE  SETTLED FOR COW MEAT 
 INSTEAD, AND  TO HIS JOY, THE EARTH FOLK 
                LIKED IT!                 
                                          
 THEN HE GOT SCAMMED  OUT  OF THE CART BY 
 A  MAN  NAMED MICKEY  MAC  DONALDS,  WHO 
   RENAMED THE BUSINESS AFTER HIMSELF.    
 WHILE NICHOLAS QUICKLY PERISHED, MICKEY  
   FUNNELED HIS INHERITED BILLIONS INTO   
 THE PROJECT,  AND  QUICKLY  EXPANDED ALL 
             OVER THE PLANET.             
                                          
                                       
                                          
         AND THE REST IS HISTORY!