dreams          
                          
                                   
                                          
                                       
                                 
                                       
                                          
         internal visionary state         
                                          
            the spirit travels            
                                          
                          
                                       
                                          
                  a cost                  
                (anecdote)                
                                          
                                        
                                          
 i  wake  suddenly,  and  for  a   second 
 everything  is completely  calm and dead 
 silent.  it's  dark,  and  warm,  and  i 
 slowly  start  to   piece   together  my 
        consciousness and my body.        
                                          
 then   the  fear  hits  me  and  i  feel 
    acutely sick. something is wrong.   
                                          
                                        
                                          
 there are circles and  crosses inscribed 
 all  over my vision, pressing in,  being 
 almost hostile. i  can feel them squirm, 
     their internal logic changing and    
 grinding trenches in my  mind. it's like 
 language, sentences i can't  hide  from, 
 forcefully  transcribed  in my mind, and 
           doing damage there.            
                                          
 then i  realize  i  can't  hear anything 
      because there's something there     
    already, droning everything out, a    
 rapid  melody,  almost caustic  in  it's 
         particular microtonality.        
                                          
                                        
                                          
 my surroundings are entirely calm.  it's 
              almost mocking.             
                                          
 i  feel  helpless,  but i  must  try  to 
 escape. to crawl on the  floor searching 
 relief,  such is my  nature. turning the 
     lights on does nothing... getting    
  outside does nothing... drinking water  
 does  noting... but  time  does  - after 
     thirty seconds i'm normal again,     
 doubting anything of  this  happened  in 
             the first place.             
                                          
 my eyes are still  tense though, scared. 
 i   don't    know    what    to    make. 
                                          
              but i'm tired.              
                                          
                                         
                                   
                                         
                                          
 this can happen  if you wander too  far, 
 i  guess?  i  shouldn't be  so  reckless 
              when dreaming?              
 i  imagine  a  prick on the nose, that's 
 what  these are. like you do  with a cat 
 who comes to  close  to your sandwich...