dreams          
                          
                                   
                                          
                                       
                                 
                                       
                                          
         internal visionary state         
                                          
            the spirit travels            
                                          
                          
                                       
                                          
                  a cost                  
                (anecdote)                
                                          
                                        
                                          
 i  wake  suddenly,  and  for  a   second 
 everything is  completely calm  and dead 
 silent.  it's  dark,  and  warm,  and  i 
 slowly  start  to   piece  together   my 
        consciousness and my body.        
                                          
 then  the  fear  hits   me  and  i  feel 
   acutely sick. something is wrong.    
                                          
                                        
                                          
 there  are circles and crosses inscribed 
 all over  my  vision, pressing in, being 
 almost  hostile. i can feel them squirm, 
     their internal logic changing and    
 grinding trenches in my  mind. it's like 
 language,  sentences i can't  hide from, 
 forcefully  transcribed in my mind,  and 
            doing damage there.           
                                          
 then  i  realize i  can't  hear anything 
      because there's something there     
    already, droning everything out, a    
 rapid  melody,  almost  caustic in  it's 
         particular microtonality.        
                                          
                                        
                                          
 my surroundings are entirely  calm. it's 
             almost mocking.              
                                          
 i  feel  helpless,  but  i  must  try to 
 escape. to crawl on  the floor searching 
 relief, such  is my nature.  turning the 
    lights on does nothing... getting     
  outside does nothing... drinking water  
 does noting...  but  time  does  - after 
     thirty seconds i'm normal again,     
 doubting  anything of this  happened  in 
             the first place.             
                                          
 my eyes are still tense  though, scared. 
 i    don't    know   what    to    make. 
                                          
              but i'm tired.              
                                          
                                         
                                   
                                         
                                          
 this can happen if you wander  too  far, 
 i  guess?  i  shouldn't  be  so reckless 
              when dreaming?              
 i imagine a prick on  the  nose,  that's 
 what  these are.  like you do with a cat 
 who comes to  close to  your sandwich...