dreams          
                          
                                   
                                          
                                       
                                 
                                       
                                          
         internal visionary state         
                                          
            the spirit travels            
                                          
                          
                                       
                                          
                  a cost                  
                (anecdote)                
                                          
                                        
                                          
 i  wake  suddenly,  and   for  a  second 
 everything is completely calm  and  dead 
 silent.  it's  dark,  and  warm,  and  i 
 slowly  start  to  piece   together   my 
        consciousness and my body.        
                                          
 then  the   fear  hits  me  and  i  feel 
   acutely sick. something is wrong.    
                                          
                                        
                                          
 there are circles  and crosses inscribed 
 all over my  vision, pressing  in, being 
 almost  hostile. i can feel them squirm, 
    their internal logic changing and     
 grinding trenches  in my mind. it's like 
 language, sentences  i  can't hide from, 
 forcefully transcribed  in my  mind, and 
           doing damage there.            
                                          
 then i  realize  i  can't  hear anything 
      because there's something there     
    already, droning everything out, a    
 rapid  melody,  almost caustic  in  it's 
        particular microtonality.         
                                          
                                        
                                          
 my surroundings are entirely calm.  it's 
              almost mocking.             
                                          
 i feel  helpless,  but  i  must  try  to 
 escape. to crawl on the  floor searching 
 relief,  such  is my nature. turning the 
    lights on does nothing... getting     
  outside does nothing... drinking water  
 does  noting...  but  time  does - after 
     thirty seconds i'm normal again,     
 doubting  anything  of this  happened in 
             the first place.             
                                          
 my eyes are  still tense though, scared. 
 i   don't    know    what    to    make. 
                                          
              but i'm tired.              
                                          
                                         
                                   
                                         
                                          
 this can happen if  you wander  too far, 
 i  guess?  i  shouldn't  be  so reckless 
              when dreaming?              
 i  imagine a  prick on the nose,  that's 
 what  these are. like you  do with a cat 
 who comes to close  to  your sandwich...