RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
...##..... «««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««« ##........
##....#### #..#######
#..##..### THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN ....######
........## THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. ###..#####
.######..# ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL ##....###.
..####.... CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. #..##..#..
#..##..##. .........#
.......... MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING ########..
#########. THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH #######..#
########.. IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO ######....
.######... THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM #####..##.
..####..## WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE ####......
#..##..... DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE ###..#####
......#### COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) ##....####
.####..##. ...##..##.
..##...... IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND ##........
#....##### CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR ...#######
..##..#### COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE ##..######
.......##. WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE .....####.
######.... OPERATION. ####..##..
.####..##. ###.......
..##...... SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY ##..######
.....####. NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: .....####.
####..##.. ####..##..
.##....... ««# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #«« .##.......
....###### ««# FOR QUIET AND CALM #«« ....######
.##..####. .##..####.
......##.. ««# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #«« ......##..
#####..... ««# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #«« #####....#
####..#### ««# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #«« ####..##..
.##....### ««# AND AT EASE #«« .##.......
....##..## ....######
.##....... ««# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #«« ###..####.
....###### ««# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #«« ##....##..
###..####. ««# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #«« #..##....#
##....##.. ......##..
...##..... ««# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #«« #####.....
##....#### ««# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #«« ####..####
#..##..### ««# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #«« .##....###
........## ««# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #«« ....##..##
.######..# ««# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #«« ###.......
..####.... ##..######
...##..##. «««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««« #....####.
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WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.