RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
¤¨¤¨¨¤¨¨¨¤ »»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»» ¨¤¤¨¨¤¨¨¨¤
¤¨¨¤¨¨¤¨¨¤ ¨¤¤¤¨¨¤¨¨¤
¤¤¨¨¤¨¨¤¨¤ THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN ¨¤¨¤¤¨¨¤¨¤
¨¤¤¨¨¤¨¨¨¤ THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. ¨¨¨¤¤¤¨¨¨¤
¨¤¤¤¨¨¤¨¨¤ ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL ¤¨¨¤¨¤¤¨¨¨
¨¤¨¤¤¨¨¤¨¤ CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. ¤¤¨¨¨¤¤¤¨¨
¨¨¨¤¤¤¨¨¨¤ ¤¤¤¨¨¤¨¤¤¨
¨¨¨¤¨¤¤¨¨¨ MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING ¤¨¤¤¨¨¨¤¤¤
¤¨¨¨¨¤¤¤¨¨ THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH ¨¨¤¤¤¨¨¤¨¤
¤¤¨¨¨¤¨¤¤¨ IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO ¨¨¤¨¤¤¨¨¨¤
¨¤¤¨¨¨¨¤¤¤ THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM ¨¨¨¨¤¤¤¨¨¤
¨¤¤¤¨¨¨¤¨¤ WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE ¤¨¨¨¤¨¤¤¨¨
¨¤¨¤¤¨¨¨¨¤ DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE ¨¤¨¨¨¨¤¤¤¨
¨¨¨¤¤¤¨¨¨¤ COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) ¨¨¤¨¨¨¤¨¤¤
¤¨¨¤¨¤¤¨¨¨ ¨¨¨¤¨¨¨¨¤¤
¤¤¨¨¨¤¤¤¨¨ IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND ¤¨¨¨¤¨¨¨¤¨
¤¤¤¨¨¤¨¤¤¨ CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR ¨¤¨¨¨¤¨¨¨¨
¤¨¤¤¨¨¨¤¤¤ COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE ¨¨¤¨¨¨¤¨¨¨
¨¨¤¤¤¨¨¤¨¤ WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE ¤¨¨¤¨¨¨¤¨¨
¨¨¤¨¤¤¨¨¨¤ OPERATION. ¨¤¨¨¤¨¨¨¤¨
¨¨¨¨¤¤¤¨¨¤ ¨¨¤¨¨¤¨¨¨¤
¤¨¨¨¤¨¤¤¨¨ SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY ¤¨¨¤¨¨¤¨¨¨
¨¤¨¨¨¨¤¤¤¨ NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: ¨¤¨¨¤¨¨¤¨¨
¨¨¤¨¨¨¤¨¤¤ ¨¨¤¨¨¤¨¨¤¨
¨¨¨¤¨¨¨¨¤¤ »»# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #»» ¨¨¨¤¨¨¤¨¨¤
¤¨¨¨¤¨¨¨¤¨ »»# FOR QUIET AND CALM #»» ¨¨¨¨¤¨¨¤¨¨
¨¤¨¨¨¤¨¨¨¨ ¤¨¨¨¨¤¨¨¤¨
¨¨¤¨¨¨¤¨¨¨ »»# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #»» ¨¤¨¨¨¨¤¨¨¤
¤¨¨¤¨¨¨¤¨¨ »»# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #»» ¨¨¤¨¨¨¨¤¨¨
¨¤¨¨¤¨¨¨¤¨ »»# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #»» ¨¨¨¤¨¨¨¨¤¨
¨¨¤¨¨¤¨¨¨¤ »»# AND AT EASE #»» ¤¨¨¨¤¨¨¨¨¤
¤¨¨¤¨¨¤¨¨¨ ¨¤¨¨¨¤¨¨¨¨
¨¤¨¨¤¨¨¤¨¨ »»# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #»» ¨¨¤¨¨¨¤¨¨¨
¨¨¤¨¨¤¨¨¤¨ »»# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #»» ¤¨¨¤¨¨¨¤¨¨
¨¨¨¤¨¨¤¨¨¤ »»# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #»» ¤¤¨¨¤¨¨¨¤¨
¨¨¨¨¤¨¨¤¨¨ ¤¤¤¨¨¤¨¨¨¤
¤¨¨¨¨¤¨¨¤¨ »»# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #»» ¤¨¤¤¨¨¤¨¨¨
¨¤¨¨¨¨¤¨¨¤ »»# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #»» ¨¨¤¤¤¨¨¤¨¨
¨¨¤¨¨¨¨¤¨¨ »»# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #»» ¨¨¤¨¤¤¨¨¤¨
¨¨¨¤¨¨¨¨¤¨ »»# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #»» ¨¨¨¨¤¤¤¨¨¤
¤¨¨¨¤¨¨¨¨¤ »»# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #»» ¤¨¨¨¤¨¤¤¨¨
¨¤¨¨¨¤¨¨¨¨ ¤¤¨¨¨¨¤¤¤¨
¨¨¤¨¨¨¤¨¨¨ »»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»» ¤¤¤¨¨¨¤¨¤¤
^^^»^ ^ »»^ ^ »^ ^»
^ ^^ ^ ^ ¨ ^¨ ¨
¨ ¨ = ¨
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WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.