RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION                     
                                                              
§§§¨¨¨¨¨¨¨ «««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««« ¨¨¨¨¨¨§§¨¨
¨§¨¨§§§§§¨                                          ¨§§§§¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨§§§¨¨ THE COMPUTER  IS  A VERY COMMON TOOL  IN ¨¨§§¨¨§§§§
¨§§§¨¨§¨¨§ THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME  WAYS EVEN NOW. ¨¨¨¨¨¨¨§§¨
¨¨§¨¨¨¨¨¨¨ ITS JOB IS  TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF  SMALL §§§§§§¨¨¨¨
§¨¨¨§§§§§§ CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT  OF TIME. §§§§§¨¨§§§
¨¨§¨¨§§§§§                                          §§§§¨¨¨¨§§
¨¨¨¨¨¨§§§¨ MOST  WORK  ON THE  PRINCIPLES OF POSING §§§¨¨§§¨¨¨
§§§§§¨¨§¨¨ THE  PROBLEM ON A  HILBERT PLANE,  WHICH §§¨¨¨¨¨¨§§
§§§§¨¨¨¨¨¨ IS  THEN  FOLDED OUT  OF  CAUSALITY,  SO ¨¨¨§§§§¨¨§
§§§¨¨§§§§§ THAT  DAEMONS   CAN  SOLVE  THE  PROBLEM §§¨¨§§¨¨¨¨
¨§¨¨¨¨§§§¨    WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE   §¨¨¨¨¨¨§§¨
¨¨¨§§¨¨§¨¨ DAEMONS  ARE  UNDER  CONTRACT  WITH  THE ¨¨§§§§¨¨¨¨
§§¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨          COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.)         ¨¨¨§§¨¨§§§
§¨¨§§§§§§§                                          §§¨¨¨¨¨¨§§
¨¨¨¨§§§§§¨   IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND   ¨¨¨§§§§¨¨§
¨§§¨¨§§§¨¨ CLERKS TO PRAY TO  THE  "GODS" OF  THEIR §§¨¨§§¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨§¨¨¨ COMPUTER, OR  TO  THE DAEMONS  DOING THE §¨¨¨¨¨¨§§§
¨§§§§¨¨¨§§ WORK,  FOR  A  QUICK   AND   FAULT  FREE ¨¨§§§§¨¨§¨
¨¨§§¨¨§¨¨¨                OPERATION.                ¨¨¨§§¨¨¨¨¨
§¨¨¨¨¨¨¨§§                                          §§¨¨¨¨§§§§
¨¨§§§§§¨¨¨       SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY      ¨¨¨§§¨¨§§§
¨¨¨§§§¨¨§§    NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE:    §§¨¨¨¨¨¨§¨
§§¨¨§¨¨¨¨§                                          §¨¨§§§§¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨§§¨¨      ««# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #««      ¨¨¨¨§§¨¨§¨
§§§§§¨¨¨¨¨        ««# FOR QUIET AND CALM #««        ¨§§¨¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨§§§¨¨§§§§                                          ¨¨¨¨§§§§§¨
¨¨§¨¨¨¨§§§     ««# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #««     §§§¨¨§§§¨¨
§¨¨¨§§¨¨§§    ««# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #««    §§¨¨¨¨§¨¨§
¨¨§¨¨¨¨¨¨§     ««# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #««     ¨¨¨§§¨¨¨¨¨
§¨¨¨§§§§¨¨            ««# AND AT EASE #««           §§¨¨¨¨§§§§
¨¨§¨¨§§¨¨¨                                          §¨¨§§¨¨§§§
¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨§§     ««# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #««     ¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨§¨
§§§§§§§¨¨¨     ««# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #««     ¨§§§§§§¨¨¨
¨§§§§§¨¨§§   ««# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #««   ¨¨§§§§¨¨§¨
¨¨§§§¨¨¨¨§                                          §¨¨§§¨¨¨¨¨
§¨¨§¨¨§§¨¨   ««# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #««    ¨¨¨¨¨¨§§§§
¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨§    ««# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #««     ¨§§§§¨¨§§§
¨§§§§§§§¨¨     ««# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #««    ¨¨§§¨¨¨¨§¨
¨¨§§§§§¨¨§     ««# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #««      §¨¨¨¨§§¨¨¨
§¨¨§§§¨¨¨¨        ««# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #««       ¨¨§§¨¨¨¨§§
¨¨¨¨§¨¨§§¨                                          §¨¨¨¨§§¨¨§
¨§§¨¨¨¨¨¨¨ «««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««« ¨¨§§¨¨¨¨¨¨
           ,,,«,      ,   ««,   ,            «,  ,«           
           ,     ,,     ,     ,     ¨     ,¨      ¨           
           ¨            ¨                  †      ¨           
                              ¨                               
                                                              
                                                              
           WOULD    YOU    CONSIDER    CODE    GOLF           
           TO    BE     A    KIND    OF     PRAYER?           
           AS   IN,   YOU   MAKE   A    CONVOLUTED,           
           INTRICATE,   BEAUTIFUL,    AND   USELESS           
           ARTIFACT.  AS  IN,  YOU'RE   USING  YOUR           
           SKILLS    TO    ASK    FOR    SOMETHING,           
                                                              
           ...I'D  ASK  FOR   A  HANDFUL  OF  BUGS?           
                                                              
           CODE   HAS    BUGS,    LOTS    OF    IT.