RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
@..@..@..@ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ @@.@@@....
.@..@..@.. @@.@.@@...
..@..@..@. THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN @@...@@@..
...@..@..@ THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. @@@..@.@@.
....@..@.. ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL @.@@...@@@
@....@..@. CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. ..@@@..@.@
@@....@..@ ..@.@@...@
.@@....@.. MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING ....@@@..@
.@@@....@. THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH @...@.@@..
.@.@@....@ IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO .@....@@@.
...@@@.... THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM ..@...@.@@
@..@.@@... WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE @..@....@@
@@...@@@.. DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE @@..@...@.
@@@..@.@@. COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) @@@..@....
@.@@...@@@ @.@@..@...
..@@@..@.@ IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND ..@@@..@..
..@.@@...@ CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR ..@.@@..@.
....@@@..@ COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE ....@@@..@
@...@.@@.. WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE ....@.@@..
.@....@@@. OPERATION. @.....@@@.
..@...@.@@ @@....@.@@
@..@....@@ SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY .@@.....@@
@@..@...@. NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: .@@@....@.
@@@..@.... .@.@@.....
@.@@..@... ~~# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #~~ ...@@@....
..@@@..@.. ~~# FOR QUIET AND CALM #~~ ...@.@@...
..@.@@..@. .....@@@..
....@@@..@ ~~# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #~~ .....@.@@.
....@.@@.. ~~# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #~~ .......@@@
@.....@@@. ~~# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #~~ @......@.@
@@....@.@@ ~~# AND AT EASE #~~ .@.......@
.@@.....@@ ..@......@
.@@@....@. ~~# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #~~ @..@......
.@.@@..... ~~# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #~~ @@..@.....
...@@@.... ~~# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #~~ .@@..@....
...@.@@... .@@@..@...
.....@@@.. ~~# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #~~ .@.@@..@..
.....@.@@. ~~# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #~~ ...@@@..@.
.......@@@ ~~# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #~~ ...@.@@..@
@......@.@ ~~# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #~~ @....@@@..
.@.......@ ~~# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #~~ @@...@.@@.
..@......@ @@@....@@@
@..@...... ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ @.@@...@.@
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~ ~~ ~ ~ . ~. .
. . % .
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WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.