RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION                     
                                                              
¨¨¨¨¨¨§¨§§ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ¨§¨§¨§§¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨§§                                          ¨¨¨¨¨§§§¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨§¨ THE COMPUTER  IS A  VERY  COMMON TOOL IN §¨¨¨¨§¨§§¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨ THE FUTURES,  AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. ¨§¨¨¨¨¨§§§
§¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨ ITS  JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF  SMALL ¨¨§¨¨¨¨§¨§
§§¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨ CALCULATIONS IN  A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. ¨¨¨§¨¨¨¨¨§
¨§§¨¨¨¨¨¨¨                                          ¨¨¨¨§¨¨¨¨§
¨§§§¨¨¨¨¨¨ MOST WORK ON  THE PRINCIPLES  OF  POSING ¨¨¨¨¨§¨¨¨¨
¨§¨§§¨¨¨¨¨ THE PROBLEM  ON A  HILBERT PLANE,  WHICH ¨¨¨¨¨¨§¨¨¨
¨¨¨§§§¨¨¨¨ IS  THEN FOLDED  OUT  OF  CAUSALITY,  SO ¨¨¨¨¨¨¨§¨¨
¨¨¨§¨§§¨¨¨ THAT  DAEMONS  CAN  SOLVE   THE  PROBLEM §¨¨¨¨¨¨¨§¨
¨¨¨¨¨§§§¨¨   WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE    ¨§¨¨¨¨¨¨¨§
§¨¨¨¨§¨§§¨ DAEMONS  ARE  UNDER  CONTRACT  WITH  THE ¨¨§¨¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨§¨¨¨¨¨§§§          COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.)         ¨¨¨§¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨§¨¨¨¨§¨§                                          ¨¨¨¨§¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨§¨¨¨¨¨§   IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND   §¨¨¨¨§¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨§¨¨¨¨§ CLERKS  TO PRAY TO THE  "GODS" OF  THEIR §§¨¨¨¨§¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨§¨¨¨¨ COMPUTER,  OR TO THE DAEMONS  DOING  THE ¨§§¨¨¨¨§¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨§¨¨¨ WORK,  FOR   A  QUICK   AND  FAULT  FREE ¨§§§¨¨¨¨§¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨¨§¨¨                OPERATION.                ¨§¨§§¨¨¨¨§
§¨¨¨¨¨¨¨§¨                                          ¨¨¨§§§¨¨¨¨
¨§¨¨¨¨¨¨¨§       SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY      §¨¨§¨§§¨¨¨
¨¨§¨¨¨¨¨¨¨    NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE:    §§¨¨¨§§§¨¨
¨¨¨§¨¨¨¨¨¨                                          §§§¨¨§¨§§¨
¨¨¨¨§¨¨¨¨¨      ~~# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #~~      §¨§§¨¨¨§§§
§¨¨¨¨§¨¨¨¨        ~~# FOR QUIET AND CALM #~~        ¨¨§§§¨¨§¨§
§§¨¨¨¨§¨¨¨                                          ¨¨§¨§§¨¨¨§
¨§§¨¨¨¨§¨¨     ~~# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #~~     ¨¨¨¨§§§¨¨§
¨§§§¨¨¨¨§¨    ~~# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #~~    ¨¨¨¨§¨§§¨¨
¨§¨§§¨¨¨¨§     ~~# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #~~     ¨¨¨¨¨¨§§§¨
¨¨¨§§§¨¨¨¨           ~~# AND AT EASE #~~            §¨¨¨¨¨§¨§§
§¨¨§¨§§¨¨¨                                          §§¨¨¨¨¨¨§§
§§¨¨¨§§§¨¨     ~~# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #~~     ¨§§¨¨¨¨¨§¨
§§§¨¨§¨§§¨     ~~# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #~~     ¨§§§¨¨¨¨¨¨
§¨§§¨¨¨§§§   ~~# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #~~   ¨§¨§§¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨§§§¨¨§¨§                                          ¨¨¨§§§¨¨¨¨
¨¨§¨§§¨¨¨§    ~~# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #~~   ¨¨¨§¨§§¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨§§§¨¨§    ~~# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #~~     ¨¨¨¨¨§§§¨¨
¨¨¨¨§¨§§¨¨    ~~# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #~~     ¨¨¨¨¨§¨§§¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨§§§¨      ~~# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #~~     ¨¨¨¨¨¨¨§§§
§¨¨¨¨¨§¨§§       ~~# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #~~        §¨¨¨¨¨¨§¨§
§§¨¨¨¨¨¨§§                                          ¨§¨¨¨¨¨¨¨§
¨§§¨¨¨¨¨§¨ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ¨¨§¨¨¨¨¨¨§
           :::~:      :  ~~:   :            ~:   :~           
           :     ::     :     :     ¨     :¨      ¨           
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           WOULD    YOU    CONSIDER    CODE    GOLF           
           TO    BE    A    KIND     OF     PRAYER?           
           AS    IN,   YOU   MAKE   A   CONVOLUTED,           
           INTRICATE,   BEAUTIFUL,    AND   USELESS           
           ARTIFACT.  AS  IN,  YOU'RE   USING  YOUR           
           SKILLS    TO    ASK    FOR    SOMETHING,           
                                                              
           ...I'D   ASK  FOR  A  HANDFUL  OF  BUGS?           
                                                              
           CODE    HAS    BUGS,    LOTS   OF    IT.