RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
¨¨¨¨¨££¨¨¨ »»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»» ¨¨¨¨¨££¨¨£
¨£££¨¨¨¨££ ££££¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨£¨¨££¨¨¨ THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN ¨££¨¨£££££
¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨££ THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. ¨¨¨¨¨¨£££¨
£££££££¨¨£ ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL £££££¨¨£¨¨
¨£££££¨¨¨¨ CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. ££££¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨£££¨¨££¨ ¨££¨¨£££££
¨¨¨£¨¨¨¨¨¨ MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING ¨¨¨¨¨¨£££¨
££¨¨¨£££££ THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH £££££¨¨£¨¨
¨¨¨£¨¨££££ IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO ££££¨¨¨¨¨¨
££¨¨¨¨¨£££ THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM £££¨¨£££££
£¨¨£££¨¨££ WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE ££¨¨¨¨££££
¨¨¨¨£¨¨¨¨£ DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE £¨¨££¨¨£££
¨££¨¨¨££¨¨ COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) ¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨£¨
¨¨¨¨£¨¨¨¨¨ ¨££££££¨¨¨
£££¨¨¨££££ IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND ¨¨££££¨¨££
££¨¨£¨¨££¨ CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR ¨¨¨££¨¨¨¨£
£¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨ COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE ££¨¨¨¨££¨¨
¨¨££££££££ WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE ¨¨¨££¨¨¨¨¨
£¨¨£££££££ OPERATION. ££¨¨¨¨££££
¨¨¨¨££££££ £¨¨££¨¨£££
¨££¨¨££££¨ SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY ¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨£¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨££¨¨ NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: ¨££££££¨¨¨
£££££¨¨¨¨¨ ¨¨££££¨¨££
££££¨¨££££ »»# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #»» £¨¨££¨¨¨¨£
£££¨¨¨¨£££ »»# FOR QUIET AND CALM #»» ¨¨¨¨¨¨££¨¨
¨£¨¨££¨¨££ £££££¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨£ »»# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #»» ££££¨¨££££
¨£££££££¨¨ »»# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #»» £££¨¨¨¨££¨
¨¨£££££¨¨¨ »»# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #»» ££¨¨££¨¨¨¨
£¨¨£££¨¨££ »»# AND AT EASE #»» £¨¨¨¨¨¨£££
¨¨¨¨£¨¨¨¨¨ ¨¨££££¨¨££
¨££¨¨¨££££ »»# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #»» £¨¨££¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨£¨¨£££ »»# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #»» ¨¨¨¨¨¨££££
¨££¨¨¨¨¨££ »»# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #»» ¨££££¨¨££¨
¨¨¨¨£££¨¨£ ¨¨££¨¨¨¨¨¨
£££¨¨£¨¨¨¨ »»# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #»» ¨¨¨¨¨£££££
££¨¨¨¨¨££¨ »»# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #»» ££££¨¨££££
£¨¨£££¨¨¨¨ »»# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #»» ¨££¨¨¨¨£££
¨¨¨¨£¨¨£££ »»# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #»» ¨¨¨¨££¨¨££
¨££¨¨¨¨¨££ »»# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #»» ¨££¨¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨£££¨¨£ ¨¨¨¨££££££
¨££¨¨£¨¨¨¨ »»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»» £££¨¨££££¨
...». . »». . ». .»
. .. . . ¨ .¨ ¨
¨ ¨ * ¨
¨
WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.