RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION                     
                                                              
¨¨¨¨§¨¨¨¨¨ ======================================== §¨§¨§§§¨¨§
§¨¨¨¨§¨¨¨¨                                          ¨¨¨¨§¨§§¨¨
¨§¨¨¨¨§¨¨¨ THE COMPUTER IS A  VERY  COMMON TOOL  IN ¨¨¨¨¨¨§§§¨
¨¨§¨¨¨¨§¨¨ THE FUTURES, AND  IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. ¨¨¨¨¨¨§¨§§
§¨¨§¨¨¨¨§¨ ITS JOB  IS  TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL ¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨§§
§§¨¨§¨¨¨¨§ CALCULATIONS  IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. §¨¨¨¨¨¨¨§¨
§§§¨¨§¨¨¨¨                                          §§¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨
§¨§§¨¨§¨¨¨ MOST  WORK ON  THE PRINCIPLES OF  POSING §§§¨¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨§§§¨¨§¨¨ THE PROBLEM ON  A  HILBERT PLANE,  WHICH §¨§§¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨§¨§§¨¨§¨ IS  THEN  FOLDED  OUT  OF CAUSALITY,  SO ¨¨§§§¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨§§§¨¨§ THAT  DAEMONS  CAN   SOLVE  THE  PROBLEM ¨¨§¨§§¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨§¨§§¨¨   WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE    ¨¨¨¨§§§¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨§§§¨ DAEMONS  ARE  UNDER  CONTRACT  WITH  THE ¨¨¨¨§¨§§¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨§¨§§          COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.)         §¨¨¨¨¨§§§¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨§§                                          ¨§¨¨¨¨§¨§§
§¨¨¨¨¨¨¨§¨   IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND   ¨¨§¨¨¨¨¨§§
§§¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨ CLERKS  TO  PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF  THEIR ¨¨¨§¨¨¨¨§¨
§§§¨¨¨¨¨¨¨ COMPUTER, OR TO  THE  DAEMONS  DOING THE ¨¨¨¨§¨¨¨¨¨
§¨§§¨¨¨¨¨¨ WORK,  FOR  A  QUICK   AND  FAULT   FREE §¨¨¨¨§¨¨¨¨
¨¨§§§¨¨¨¨¨                OPERATION.                §§¨¨¨¨§¨¨¨
¨¨§¨§§¨¨¨¨                                          ¨§§¨¨¨¨§¨¨
¨¨¨¨§§§¨¨¨      SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY       ¨§§§¨¨¨¨§¨
¨¨¨¨§¨§§¨¨    NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE:    ¨§¨§§¨¨¨¨§
§¨¨¨¨¨§§§¨                                          ¨¨¨§§§¨¨¨¨
¨§¨¨¨¨§¨§§      ==# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #==      ¨¨¨§¨§§¨¨¨
¨¨§¨¨¨¨¨§§        ==# FOR QUIET AND CALM #==        ¨¨¨¨¨§§§¨¨
¨¨¨§¨¨¨¨§¨                                          §¨¨¨¨§¨§§¨
¨¨¨¨§¨¨¨¨¨     ==# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #==     ¨§¨¨¨¨¨§§§
§¨¨¨¨§¨¨¨¨    ==# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #==    ¨¨§¨¨¨¨§¨§
§§¨¨¨¨§¨¨¨     ==# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #==     ¨¨¨§¨¨¨¨¨§
¨§§¨¨¨¨§¨¨            ==# AND AT EASE #==           ¨¨¨¨§¨¨¨¨§
¨§§§¨¨¨¨§¨                                          ¨¨¨¨¨§¨¨¨¨
¨§¨§§¨¨¨¨§     ==# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #==     §¨¨¨¨¨§¨¨¨
¨¨¨§§§¨¨¨¨     ==# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #==     ¨§¨¨¨¨¨§¨¨
¨¨¨§¨§§¨¨¨   ==# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #==   ¨¨§¨¨¨¨¨§¨
¨¨¨¨¨§§§¨¨                                          §¨¨§¨¨¨¨¨§
§¨¨¨¨§¨§§¨    ==# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #==   §§¨¨§¨¨¨¨¨
¨§¨¨¨¨¨§§§    ==# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #==     §§§¨¨§¨¨¨¨
¨¨§¨¨¨¨§¨§    ==# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #==     §¨§§¨¨§¨¨¨
¨¨¨§¨¨¨¨¨§      ==# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #==     ¨¨§§§¨¨§¨¨
¨¨¨¨§¨¨¨¨§        ==# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #==       ¨¨§¨§§¨¨§¨
¨¨¨¨¨§¨¨¨¨                                          ¨¨¨¨§§§¨¨§
§¨¨¨¨¨§¨¨¨ ======================================== ¨¨¨¨§¨§§¨¨
           ^^^=^      ^   ==^   ^           =^   ^=           
           ^      ^^     ^     ^     ¨     ^¨     ¨           
           ¨            ¨                  *      ¨           
                              ¨                               
                                                              
                                                              
           WOULD    YOU    CONSIDER    CODE    GOLF           
           TO    BE     A    KIND     OF    PRAYER?           
           AS    IN,   YOU   MAKE   A   CONVOLUTED,           
           INTRICATE,   BEAUTIFUL,   AND    USELESS           
           ARTIFACT.  AS   IN,  YOU'RE  USING  YOUR           
           SKILLS    TO    ASK    FOR    SOMETHING,           
                                                              
           ...I'D  ASK   FOR  A  HANDFUL  OF  BUGS?           
                                                              
           CODE    HAS    BUGS,    LOTS   OF    IT.