RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
@@¨¨¨¨¨@¨¨ »»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»» ¨@¨@¨¨@¨@¨
@@@¨¨¨¨¨@¨ ¨¨¨¨@¨¨¨¨¨
@¨@@¨¨¨¨¨@ THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN @¨¨¨¨@¨¨¨¨
¨¨@@@¨¨¨¨¨ THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. ¨@¨¨¨¨@¨¨¨
¨¨@¨@@¨¨¨¨ ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL ¨¨@¨¨¨¨@¨¨
¨¨¨¨@@@¨¨¨ CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. ¨¨¨@¨¨¨¨@¨
¨¨¨¨@¨@@¨¨ ¨¨¨¨@¨¨¨¨@
@¨¨¨¨¨@@@¨ MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING ¨¨¨¨¨@¨¨¨¨
¨@¨¨¨¨@¨@@ THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH ¨¨¨¨¨¨@¨¨¨
¨¨@¨¨¨¨¨@@ IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO @¨¨¨¨¨¨@¨¨
¨¨¨@¨¨¨¨@¨ THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM ¨@¨¨¨¨¨¨@¨
¨¨¨¨@¨¨¨¨¨ WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE ¨¨@¨¨¨¨¨¨@
@¨¨¨¨@¨¨¨¨ DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE @¨¨@¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨@¨¨¨¨@¨¨¨ COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) @@¨¨@¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨@¨¨¨¨@¨¨ @@@¨¨@¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨@¨¨¨¨@¨ IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND @¨@@¨¨@¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨@¨¨¨¨@ CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR ¨¨@@@¨¨@¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨@¨¨¨¨ COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE ¨¨@¨@@¨¨@¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨@¨¨¨ WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE @¨¨¨@@@¨¨@
@¨¨¨¨¨¨@¨¨ OPERATION. @@¨¨@¨@@¨¨
¨@¨¨¨¨¨¨@¨ ¨@@¨¨¨@@@¨
¨¨@¨¨¨¨¨¨@ SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY ¨@@@¨¨@¨@@
@¨¨@¨¨¨¨¨¨ NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: ¨@¨@@¨¨¨@@
@@¨¨@¨¨¨¨¨ ¨¨¨@@@¨¨@¨
@@@¨¨@¨¨¨¨ »»# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #»» ¨¨¨@¨@@¨¨¨
@¨@@¨¨@¨¨¨ »»# FOR QUIET AND CALM #»» ¨¨¨¨¨@@@¨¨
¨¨@@@¨¨@¨¨ ¨¨¨¨¨@¨@@¨
¨¨@¨@@¨¨@¨ »»# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #»» @¨¨¨¨¨¨@@@
@¨¨¨@@@¨¨@ »»# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #»» @@¨¨¨¨¨@¨@
@@¨¨@¨@@¨¨ »»# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #»» @@@¨¨¨¨¨¨@
¨@@¨¨¨@@@¨ »»# AND AT EASE #»» @¨@@¨¨¨¨¨@
¨@@@¨¨@¨@@ ¨¨@@@¨¨¨¨¨
¨@¨@@¨¨¨@@ »»# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #»» ¨¨@¨@@¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨@@@¨¨@¨ »»# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #»» ¨¨¨¨@@@¨¨¨
¨¨¨@¨@@¨¨¨ »»# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #»» ¨¨¨¨@¨@@¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨@@@¨¨ @¨¨¨¨¨@@@¨
¨¨¨¨¨@¨@@¨ »»# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #»» @@¨¨¨¨@¨@@
@¨¨¨¨¨¨@@@ »»# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #»» @@@¨¨¨¨¨@@
@@¨¨¨¨¨@¨@ »»# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #»» @¨@@¨¨¨¨@¨
@@@¨¨¨¨¨¨@ »»# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #»» ¨¨@@@¨¨¨¨¨
@¨@@¨¨¨¨¨@ »»# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #»» ¨¨@¨@@¨¨¨¨
¨¨@@@¨¨¨¨¨ ¨¨¨¨@@@¨¨¨
¨¨@¨@@¨¨¨¨ »»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»» ¨¨¨¨@¨@@¨¨
...». . »». . ». .»
. .. . . ¨ .¨ ¨
¨ ¨ $ ¨
¨
WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.