RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
¨¨&¨&¨&¨&¨ ======================================== &&¨&¨&&¨&&
¨&&¨&¨&¨&¨ ¨&¨&¨¨&¨¨&
¨¨&¨&¨&¨&¨ THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN &&¨&¨&&¨&&
¨&&¨&¨&¨&¨ THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. ¨&¨&¨¨&¨¨&
¨¨&¨&¨&¨&¨ ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL &&¨&¨&&¨&&
¨&&¨&¨&¨&¨ CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. ¨&¨&¨¨&¨¨&
¨¨&¨&¨&¨&¨ &&¨&¨&&¨&&
¨&&¨&¨&¨&¨ MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING ¨&¨&¨¨&¨¨&
¨¨&¨&¨&¨&¨ THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH &&¨&¨&&¨&&
¨&&¨&¨&¨&¨ IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO ¨&¨&¨¨&¨¨&
¨¨&¨&¨&¨&¨ THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM &&¨&¨&&¨&&
¨&&¨&¨&¨&¨ WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE ¨&¨&¨¨&¨¨&
¨¨&¨&¨&¨&¨ DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE &&¨&¨&&¨&&
¨&&¨&¨&¨&¨ COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) ¨&¨&¨¨&¨¨&
¨¨&¨&¨&¨&¨ &&¨&¨&&¨&&
¨&&¨&¨&¨&¨ IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND ¨&¨&¨¨&¨¨&
¨¨&¨&¨&¨&¨ CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR &&¨&¨&&¨&&
¨&&¨&¨&¨&¨ COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE ¨&¨&¨¨&¨¨&
¨¨&¨&¨&¨&¨ WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE &&¨&¨&&¨&&
¨&&¨&¨&¨&¨ OPERATION. ¨&¨&¨¨&¨¨&
¨¨&¨&¨&¨&¨ &&¨&¨&&¨&&
¨&&¨&¨&¨&¨ SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY ¨&¨&¨¨&¨¨&
¨¨&¨&¨&¨&¨ NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: &&¨&¨&&¨&&
¨&&¨&¨&¨&¨ ¨&¨&¨¨&¨¨&
¨¨&¨&¨&¨&¨ ==# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #== &&¨&¨&&¨&&
¨&&¨&¨&¨&¨ ==# FOR QUIET AND CALM #== ¨&¨&¨¨&¨¨&
¨¨&¨&¨&¨&¨ &&¨&¨&&¨&&
¨&&¨&¨&¨&¨ ==# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #== ¨&¨&¨¨&¨¨&
¨¨&¨&¨&¨&¨ ==# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #== &&¨&¨&&¨&&
¨&&¨&¨&¨&¨ ==# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #== ¨&¨&¨¨&¨¨&
¨¨&¨&¨&¨&¨ ==# AND AT EASE #== &&¨&¨&&¨&&
¨&&¨&¨&¨&¨ ¨&¨&¨¨&¨¨&
¨¨&¨&¨&¨&¨ ==# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #== &&¨&¨&&¨&&
¨&&¨&¨&¨&¨ ==# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #== ¨&¨&¨¨&¨¨&
¨¨&¨&¨&¨&¨ ==# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #== &&¨&¨&&¨&&
¨&&¨&¨&¨&¨ ¨&¨&¨¨&¨¨&
¨¨&¨&¨&¨&¨ ==# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #== &&¨&¨&&¨&&
¨&&¨&¨&¨&¨ ==# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #== ¨&¨&¨¨&¨¨&
¨¨&¨&¨&¨&¨ ==# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #== &&¨&¨&&¨&&
¨&&¨&¨&¨&¨ ==# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #== ¨&¨&¨¨&¨¨&
¨¨&¨&¨&¨&¨ ==# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #== &&¨&¨&&¨&&
¨&&¨&¨&¨&¨ ¨&¨&¨¨&¨¨&
¨¨&¨&¨&¨&¨ ======================================== &&¨&¨&&¨&&
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WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.