RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
&¨¨¨&¨¨¨¨¨ ======================================== &¨¨¨¨¨&&¨¨
¨¨&¨¨¨&&&& ¨¨&&&¨¨¨¨¨
&¨¨¨&¨¨&&& THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN &¨¨&¨¨&&&&
¨¨&¨¨¨¨¨&¨ THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. ¨¨¨¨¨¨¨&&&
¨¨¨¨&&&¨¨¨ ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL ¨&&&&&¨¨&¨
&&&¨¨&¨¨&¨ CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. ¨¨&&&¨¨¨¨¨
¨&¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨ ¨¨¨&¨¨&&&¨
¨¨¨&&&&&&& MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING &&¨¨¨¨¨&¨¨
&&¨¨&&&&&& THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH &¨¨&&&¨¨¨&
&¨¨¨¨&&&&¨ IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO ¨¨¨¨&¨¨&¨¨
¨¨&&¨¨&&¨¨ THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM &&&¨¨¨¨¨¨¨
&¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨ WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE &&¨¨&&&&&&
¨¨&&&&&&&& DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE ¨¨¨¨¨&&&&&
¨¨¨&&&&&&& COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) &&&&¨¨&&&¨
&&¨¨&&&&&& ¨&&¨¨¨¨&¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨&&&&¨ IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND ¨¨¨¨&&¨¨¨¨
&&&&¨¨&&¨¨ CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR ¨&&¨¨¨¨&&&
&&&¨¨¨¨¨¨& COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE ¨¨¨¨&&¨¨&&
&&¨¨&&&&¨¨ WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE &&&¨¨¨¨¨¨&
&¨¨¨¨&&¨¨¨ OPERATION. &&¨¨&&&&¨¨
¨¨&&¨¨¨¨&& ¨¨¨¨¨&&¨¨¨
&¨¨¨¨&&¨¨& SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY &&&&¨¨¨¨&&
¨¨&&¨¨¨¨¨¨ NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: &&&¨¨&&¨¨&
¨¨¨¨¨&&&&& &&¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨
&&&&¨¨&&&& ==# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #== &¨¨&&&&&&&
&&&¨¨¨¨&&¨ ==# FOR QUIET AND CALM #== ¨¨¨¨&&&&&&
&&¨¨&&¨¨¨¨ ¨&&¨¨&&&&&
&¨¨¨¨¨¨&&& ==# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #== ¨¨¨¨¨¨&&&&
¨¨&&&&¨¨&& ==# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #== &&&&&¨¨&&&
¨¨¨&&¨¨¨¨¨ ==# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #== &&&&¨¨¨¨&¨
&&¨¨¨¨&&&& ==# AND AT EASE #== &&&¨¨&&¨¨¨
¨¨¨&&¨¨&&¨ &&¨¨¨¨¨¨&¨
&&¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨ ==# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #== &¨¨&&&&¨¨¨
¨¨¨&&&&&&& ==# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #== ¨¨¨¨&&¨¨&¨
&&¨¨&&&&&& ==# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #== &&&¨¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨&&&&& &&¨¨&&&&&¨
&&&&¨¨&&&& ==# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #== &¨¨¨¨&&&¨¨
¨&&¨¨¨¨&&¨ ==# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #== ¨¨&&¨¨&¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨&&¨¨¨¨ ==# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #== &¨¨¨¨¨¨¨&&
¨&&¨¨¨¨&&¨ ==# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #== ¨¨&&&&&¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨&&¨¨¨¨ ==# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #== ¨¨¨&&&¨¨&&
¨&&¨¨¨¨&&¨ &&¨¨&¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨&&¨¨¨¨ ======================================== &¨¨¨¨¨&&&&
,,,=, , ==, , =, ,=
, ,, , , ¨ ,¨ ¨
¨ ¨ † ¨
¨
WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.