RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
.&&&&&..&& «««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««« &&.&..&&&&
&....&.&.& .&&&.&...&
&...&&&&&& THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN &..&&&..&.
&..&...... THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. &.&..&.&&&
&.&&.....& ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL &&&.&&&...
&&.&....&& CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. ..&&..&..&
.&&&...&.& .&.&.&&.&.
&..&..&&&. MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING &&&&&.&&&.
&.&&.&..&. THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH ....&&..&&
&&.&&&.&&& IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO ...&.&.&..
.&&..&&... THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM ..&&&&&&.&
&.&.&.&..& WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE .&.....&&&
&&&&&&&.&& DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE &&....&...
......&&.& COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) .&...&&..&
.....&.&&. &&..&.&.&&
....&&&.&. IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND .&.&&&&&.&
...&..&&&. CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR &&&....&&&
..&&.&..&. COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE ..&...&..&
.&.&&&.&&. WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE .&&..&&.&&
&&&..&&.&. OPERATION. &.&.&.&&.&
..&.&.&&&. &&&&&&.&&.
.&&&&&..&& SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY .....&&.&.
&....&.&.. NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: ....&.&&&.
&...&&&&.& ...&&&..&&
&..&...&&. ««# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #«« ..&..&.&..
&.&&..&.&& ««# FOR QUIET AND CALM #«« .&&.&&&&.&
&&.&.&&&.. &.&&...&&.
.&&&&..&.. ««# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #«« &&.&..&.&&
&...&.&&.. ««# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #«« .&&&.&&&.&
&..&&&.&.. ««# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #«« &..&&..&&.
&.&..&&&.. ««# AND AT EASE #«« &.&.&.&.&&
&&&.&..&.. &&&&&&&&..
..&&&.&&.& ««# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #«« .......&.&
.&..&&.&&. ««# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #«« ......&&&&
&&.&.&&.&. ««# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #«« .....&...&
.&&&&.&&&. ....&&..&.
&...&&..&. ««# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #«« ...&.&.&&.
&..&.&.&&. ««# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #«« ..&&&&&.&&
&.&&&&&.&& ««# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #«« .&....&&..
&&....&&.& ««# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #«« &&...&.&.&
.&...&.&&. ««# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #«« .&..&&&&&.
&&..&&&.&. &&.&....&.
.&.&..&&&& «««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««« .&&&...&&&
^^^«^ ^ ««^ ^ «^ ^«
^ ^^ ^ ^ . ^. .
. . § .
.
WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.