RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
,,&&,,,,,& ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ,,,,,,&&,,
,,&,&,,,,& ,,,,,,&,&,
,,&&&&,,,& THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN ,,,,,,&&&&
&,&,,,&,,& THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. &,,,,,&,,,
&&&&,,&&,& ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL &&,,,,&&,,
&,,,&,&,&& CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. ,,&,,,&,&,
&&,,&&&&&, ,,&&,,&&&&
,,&,&,,,,& MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING ,,&,&,&,,,
,,&&&&,,,& THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH ,,&&&&&&,,
,,&,,,&,,& IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO &,&,,,,,&,
,,&&,,&&,& THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM &&&&,,,,&&
&,&,&,&,&& WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE ,,,,&,,,&,
&&&&&&&&&, DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE &,,,&&,,&&
,,,,,,,,,& COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) ,&,,&,&,&,
,,,,,,,,,& ,&&,&&&&&&
&,,,,,,,,& IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND ,&,&&,,,,,
&&,,,,,,,& CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR ,&&&,&,,,,
&,&,,,,,,& COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE ,&,,&&&,,,
&&&&,,,,,& WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE ,&&,&,,&,,
&,,,&,,,,& OPERATION. &&,&&&,&&,
&&,,&&,,,& ,,&&,,&&,&
,,&,&,&,,& SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY &,&,&,&,&&
&,&&&&&&,& NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: ,&&&&&&&&,
&&&,,,,,&& ,&,,,,,,,&
,,,&,,,,&, ~~# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #~~ ,&&,,,,,,&
&,,&&,,,&& ~~# FOR QUIET AND CALM #~~ &&,&,,,,,&
,&,&,&,,&, ,,&&&,,,,&
&&&&&&&,&& ~~# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #~~ ,,&,,&,,,&
,,,,,,,&&, ~~# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #~~ &,&&,&&,,&
&,,,,,,&,& ~~# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #~~ ,&&,&&,&,&
,&,,,,,&&& ~~# AND AT EASE #~~ ,&,&&,&&&&
&&&,,,,&,, &&&&,&&,,,
&,,&,,,&&, ~~# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #~~ &,,,&&,&,,
&&,&&,,&,& ~~# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #~~ &&,,&,&&&,
&,&&,&,&&& ~~# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #~~ &,&,&&&,,&
,&&,&&&&,, &&&&&,,&,&
&&,&&,,,&, ~~# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #~~ &,,,,&,&&&
,,&&,&,,&& ~~# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #~~ &&,,,&&&,,
,,&,&&&,&, ~~# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #~~ &,&,,&,,&,
,,&&&,,&&& ~~# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #~~ ,&&&,&&,&&
&,&,,&,&,, ~~# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #~~ ,&,,&&,&&,
&&&&,&&&&, ,&&,&,&&,&
,,,,&&,,,& ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ &&,&&&&,&&
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WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.