dreams          
                          
                                   
                                          
                                       
                                 
                                       
                                          
         internal visionary state         
                                          
            the spirit travels            
                                          
                          
                                       
                                          
                  a cost                  
                (anecdote)                
                                          
                                        
                                          
 i  wake   suddenly,  and  for  a  second 
 everything is  completely  calm and dead 
 silent.  it's  dark,  and  warm,  and  i 
 slowly  start   to  piece   together  my 
        consciousness and my body.        
                                          
 then  the  fear   hits  me  and  i  feel 
    acutely sick. something is wrong.   
                                          
                                        
                                          
 there are circles  and crosses inscribed 
 all  over  my vision, pressing in, being 
 almost  hostile. i can feel them squirm, 
    their internal logic changing and     
 grinding  trenches in my mind. it's like 
 language, sentences  i can't  hide from, 
 forcefully transcribed in  my  mind, and 
           doing damage there.            
                                          
 then i  realize i  can't  hear  anything 
     because there's something there      
    already, droning everything out, a    
 rapid melody,  almost  caustic  in  it's 
        particular microtonality.         
                                          
                                        
                                          
 my surroundings  are entirely calm. it's 
             almost mocking.              
                                          
 i feel  helpless,  but  i  must  try  to 
 escape. to crawl  on the floor searching 
 relief,  such  is my nature. turning the 
    lights on does nothing... getting     
  outside does nothing... drinking water  
 does noting...  but time  does  -  after 
     thirty seconds i'm normal again,     
 doubting anything of  this  happened  in 
             the first place.             
                                          
 my eyes are still  tense though, scared. 
 i   don't    know    what    to    make. 
                                          
              but i'm tired.              
                                          
                                         
                                   
                                         
                                          
 this  can happen if you wander  too far, 
 i  guess?  i  shouldn't  be so  reckless 
              when dreaming?              
 i  imagine a  prick  on the nose, that's 
 what these  are. like you do  with a cat 
 who comes  to close  to your sandwich...