dreams          
                          
                                   
                                          
                                       
                                 
                                       
                                          
         internal visionary state         
                                          
            the spirit travels            
                                          
                          
                                       
                                          
                  a cost                  
                (anecdote)                
                                          
                                        
                                          
 i   wake  suddenly,  and  for  a  second 
 everything is  completely calm  and dead 
 silent.  it's  dark,  and  warm,  and  i 
 slowly   start  to   piece  together  my 
        consciousness and my body.        
                                          
 then  the  fear  hits   me  and  i  feel 
   acutely sick. something is wrong.    
                                          
                                        
                                          
 there are circles and  crosses inscribed 
 all over  my  vision, pressing in, being 
 almost hostile. i can  feel them squirm, 
    their internal logic changing and     
 grinding trenches in  my mind. it's like 
 language,  sentences i  can't hide from, 
 forcefully  transcribed in  my mind, and 
            doing damage there.           
                                          
 then  i  realize  i  can't hear anything 
     because there's something there      
    already, droning everything out, a    
 rapid  melody,  almost  caustic in  it's 
         particular microtonality.        
                                          
                                        
                                          
 my surroundings are entirely calm.  it's 
              almost mocking.             
                                          
 i  feel  helpless,  but  i  must  try to 
 escape. to  crawl on the floor searching 
 relief, such is my  nature.  turning the 
    lights on does nothing... getting     
  outside does nothing... drinking water  
 does noting...  but  time  does  - after 
     thirty seconds i'm normal again,     
 doubting anything  of this  happened  in 
             the first place.             
                                          
 my eyes  are still tense though, scared. 
 i    don't    know    what   to    make. 
                                          
              but i'm tired.              
                                          
                                         
                                   
                                         
                                          
 this can happen  if you  wander too far, 
 i  guess? i  shouldn't  be  so  reckless 
              when dreaming?              
 i imagine  a  prick on the  nose, that's 
 what these are. like you do with  a  cat 
 who comes to close  to  your sandwich...